Being nice.

Here's the news: being nice doesn't seem to get anyone anywhere but it's still a worthy pursuit.

Society doesn't care too much about people being nice, we all focus on the negative. You can tell how important being nice really is when people that are in general complete cunts are nice once in a blue moon and for some reason that excuses them from being a twatbag the rest of the time.

Examples include but are not limited to:






Simon Cowell. A man that is such a caricature of nastiness his stage act has consumed him to the extent he no longer knows who he really is inside and probably has no real desire to find out. Simon Cowell wants to drink 2 bottles of red wine, hug a 20-something man for a straight hour and cry his eyes out then come out the other side with a hangover, drained tearducts and a sense of what he has become, throwing his black turtle neck jumper aside and striding down a Los Angeles street towards a gay sauna with a new sense of purpose.

Cowell is the perfect example of the type of person I am trying to llustrate, 95% complete and utter bastard that can get away with making a nice comment 5% of the time and people will say "I like him, see he is not that bad". Yes. Yes he is. He is a square headed cunt.




Gordon Ramsay.

The type of man that would reduce your girlfriend to tears for the sheer pleasure of it if she pulled out on him in a supermarket carpark, years of shouting the odds at teenage commis chefs have instilled in him that rudeness and all round cuntery can be passed off as assertiveness and self belief. Craggy faced, shouty, economically inept bully.



Elton John.

A man who has stolen the historically female concept of the diva and refuses point blank to give it back. Overinflated and egotistical to the point of boredom, lives in a world populated by the sycophantic and the servile. Furnish needs to tie him up, administer a sound beating and an energetic bumming and then look him straight in the eye and say "there are Princess Diana's everywhere Reg, let's start treating people with some damn respect."

A fitting quote to end on, and one from a member of seminal Welsh hip hop crew Goldie Lookin' Chain in reference to Elton John: "It's nice to be important, but it's important to be nice."

Bang on sir.